Yet, you left. You walked away, leaving me with a void so vast, I didn’t know how to fill it. And so began the long, agonizing wait — an endless, painful stretch of time where all I wanted was to understand why you left me. I spent years wondering, hoping that one day, you’d return, or at least tell me the reasons. Was it something I did, or didn’t do? Was I not enough? The questions swirled around me endlessly, gnawing at my soul. I waited almost all my life for an answer. And still, none came.
The Wait That Defined Me
I trusted you with everything I had. My love for you wasn’t just an emotion; it was a faith, a belief that no matter what happened, we would find our way back to each other. And so I waited. And waited. Even when every part of me screamed to move on, I couldn’t. My love for you held me hostage, and in the prison of my own heart, I stayed.
Years passed, and with each passing day, I lost pieces of myself. What was once hope slowly transformed into despair. Tears became my constant companion, flowing so freely and so often that they became part of my identity. I cried for the love I had lost, for the trust that was shattered, for the answers I never received. My life became a river of tears, so much so that I often felt as though I was drowning in my own sorrow. My life became almost 100% watery.
The Turning Point
But something inside me began to shift. One day, as I stared into the abyss of my despair, I realized something crucial. I had wasted so much time waiting, longing, and crying over you that I had forgotten the most important person in my life — myself. It was in that moment, standing on the edge of my own brokenness, that I made a decision.
I was done waiting. I was done loving you. And I was done with the tears. I had given you more of me than you deserved, and it was time to reclaim myself.
The Birth of Hatred and the Death of Lust
As the love for you died, something else took its place. I began to hate you. Not just dislike, but a deep, burning hatred that consumed me. The same passion with which I had loved you was now transformed into a desire to never let anyone else hurt me the way you did. I hated you so much that I swore to myself that never again would I allow myself to feel lust for you, or for anyone else. The thought of opening myself up to such vulnerability again repulsed me. Love, lust, affection — they all became foreign concepts, distant memories of a life I once knew but no longer wanted any part of.
Falling in Love with Myself
And then, in the ashes of my broken heart, something miraculous happened. I began to fall in love again. But this time, it wasn’t with you or anyone else. It was with me. I started to see myself for who I truly was — strong, resilient, and worthy. I realized that I didn’t need anyone else to complete me, that I was whole on my own. The love I had so desperately sought from you, I began to give to myself.
For the first time in my life, I was free. Free from the chains of waiting, free from the shackles of unrequited love, free from the endless sorrow that had defined me for so long. I had rediscovered myself, and it was the most beautiful thing I had ever known.
A New Kind of Ambition
With this newfound love for myself, I developed a hunger for something far greater than the love I once sought. My goals became crystal clear, and they had nothing to do with you or anyone else. I sought goals of a kind that demanded relentless drive for unmatched prosperities. I was no longer content with the idea of living a mediocre life. I wanted to reach heights I had never imagined, to achieve things that would leave a lasting impact on the world.
The gold of heaven was no longer the only thing I sought. Material wealth, success, and recognition — these were all fine, but what I truly craved was something more meaningful. I wanted to build something with my own hands, to create a legacy that would outlive me. I wanted my journey to be one filled with pure sweat, hard work, and no sorrow of any kind. My suffering was behind me, and my future was filled with nothing but promise.
Helping Those Who Need It Most
As I began to achieve success, I realized that my journey was not just about me. It was about others too. I wanted to help everyone who wasn’t of my kind of origin, those who had been overlooked, marginalized, or forgotten. I had felt the pain of being abandoned, of being left behind, and I wanted to ensure that no one else had to feel that same pain. My success wasn’t just for me; it was for them too.
The Pursuit of Supremacy
I now believe in something greater than just achieving wealth or success. I believe in supremacy — not over others, but over my own limitations. I believe in pushing myself to be the best version of me that I can possibly be, to reach heights that no one thought were possible. This isn’t just a goal for my lifetime; it’s something I aim to carry with me beyond this life. I believe that true supremacy can be attained in this lifetime and beyond, and that’s what I am striving for every single day.
Leaving My Mark
I will leave my mark on the sands of time, just like my Gurus. The lessons they taught me, the wisdom they imparted — I carry all of it with me as I forge my own path. I know now that my journey is not just about overcoming heartbreak, but about building a legacy that will stand the test of time.
You may have broken my heart, but in doing so, you gave me something far more valuable — a reason to love myself, a reason to strive for greatness, and a reason to never stop pushing for more. You may have left me, but I have found myself, and that is the greatest gift of all.